Dilemma

It’s a terrible thing to blog about everything because the whole world and his wife (and kids) see inside you. But that is my pitfall cos I can’t shut up!! I enrolled on a teacher training course (don’t laugh…I am actually a brilliant teacher – and I love to beat my own drums). So I have basically almost got my Certificate in Education and Training. Now the second stage is the Diploma and I have been advised to go for it. Thing is… I want to and I don’t want to. I want to cos even though teaching is honestly the hardest job in the world (as far as I’m concerned) it is also soooooooo fulfilling!!!  I want to concentrate on my art, I have deadlines (I have set for myself) and enrolling on this Diploma would just put another year on a ‘walking pace’ towards meeting my deadlines.  I don’t know what to do. Whether to carry on burning the candle at both ends or to not go for the Diploma. I’ve been on a grind this past year…(an interesting yet challenging one, mind you) but I have been splitting myself in two and I just don’t want to anymore…I want to but I don’t (if you get what I mean…cos I don’t get what I mean…I probably do – why do I ramble???? ( I’m talking to me now)…because I love it (rambling, that is..)…). I haven’t even answered my question…and I’m still chatting ‘nonsense’ or maybe not. Maybe pouring it all out for the world and his wife (no offence, dear readers- I can’t help myself…got shoe (not foot) in mouth syndrome)…so maybe pouring it out for the ‘world and his wife’ to see…will help me…maybe…(I seriously cannot help myself…wow) I just keep chatting…aaaaaarrrrrrghhh!!!!!